Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Affirmations to the 4th Power

I've been lucky to have good coaches and mentors in my life. They are the people who've given me a break, offered a hand up, encouraged me to keep going, or challenged me to reach a little farther. Heck, I wouldn't be here without them. Some are family, some are teachers, some are bosses, and some are current colleagues. In some small way each of you who read and comment on this blog are contributors and coaches.

There are a couple aspects of coaching that I am undeniably convinced work. One is goal setting. Darren Hardy provides an abridged plan to goal setting that I like. Since his goal setting map was posted at the beginning of the year, it involves a review of the past 12 months plus lessons learned. I took this conscious step a couple weeks back. What really caught me is the 2nd step - to reflect on life with gratitude. In other words, look at the parts of my life - both play and work - for which I am grateful. This may seem a better exercise for harvest time but I think its even more valuable today. I won't bore you with all the things I'm thankful for - suffice to say the list is long.

A second aspect is the process of writing down affirmations. And writing them down is the key. I was in training the last couple days and was reminded how valuable is the habit of writing the phrase - I can. Here's my list of 4 affirmations for 2007:

  1. I can exercise patience and empathy with Deb and her folks by listening. My mother-in-law is battling dementia, my father-in-law is tussling with losing his vision, and my bride is spending a great deal of time with them. Its a strain on her and I'm certain will grow greater in the months to come. I can be patient and empathetic.
  2. I can stay fit and eat a healthy diet by remembering how far I've come. It was just a couple years ago - the blink of an eye really - I took control of this part of my life and changed my lifestyle. I eat better and exercise more. Life is not a dress rehearsal, its in living color.
  3. I can post to this blog - and my Zaadz blog - a minimum of twice per week and build a community one reader at a time. I can do this with or without comments and feedback but it can be a lot more fun with you. I can comment on other blogs and make a bigger community.
  4. I can maintain self control through day to day life by living for now. Nothing can be done about the past and nobody knows the future - believe me on this one!
In order to make these affirmations reality, I can use a little organization - and humor. I love this link because the guys at 43folders use my brand of PDA. It cracks me up that nobody can patent or copyright it. Talk about open source! They have their comments currently closed so come back here - straight away I tell you - and share some of the things YOU CAN do!

8 comments:

Robyn McMaster said...

Hi Bob, I really enjoy your "can do" list. Do you have a plan for the times that crisis comes and causes anger to swell up within. Without that, all the good intentions in the can do list easily unravel. Having a way to bust the barriers as they come in a flash is also a must do to go along with your "can do's" is a "must do." Thoughts?

BobG said...

Thank you for your timely question, Robyn. I had a chance this morning to deal with crisis and anger. If I hadn't spent time with affirmations recently, I'm certain today would have been very different. Let me break down the steps. I believe they happen quickly and unconsciously. First I remembered it wasn't the end of the world. Second, I can be in control of my reaction to a minor roadblock - anger v. acceptance. Third, I can be assertive without being aggressive. The situation was one that needed to be brought to the attention of another department and colleague.
I like how you put it - "busting the barriers in a flash" - it DOES happen that quickly. Losing my temper or being angry is not a big pitfall for me - dealing with anger in a healthy manner is another story :). I'm going to place it under my "I can maintain self control"
Thank you again for your sharp question!

Cord Silverstein said...

Bob,

We all need to do that more so we don't get tangled up in all the minutia and BS of our lives. Sometimes it is hard to remember what truly is important and what is just white noise. Great post.

BobG said...

Thanks Cord - I love it when we can remind each other of the things we should remember!

The Hairy Beast said...

Hairy Beast Affirmations:

"I will not vomit up this last beer!"

"Just because he's thirty pounds bigger than me doesn't mean I can't kick his butt!"

"Even though I have bought her $75 worth of top-shelf-tequila shots she's going to go home with me because deep down she really likes me as a person."

"The engineers at work really appreciate it when I point out the flaws in their designs and it only increases their respect for me."

BobG said...

The Beast slays me...

Sandra said...

Bob,

I liked reading your post. Recognizing all that I have with gratitude every day is important to me. Thanks for the reminder!

Sandy

BobG said...

...and thank you for leaving a comment, Sandra!